February is LGBT History Month, a time to celebrate the lives and achievements of the gay community. In college, the LGBTQ society will be arranging a series of events to celebrate and raise awareness - from drag races to fake weddings.
At this time, though, it also seems appropriate to consider the darker side of growing up gay, bi or trans - in late December the suicide of American transgender teenager, Leelah Alcorn, took the internet by storm.
Alcon had felt “like a girl trapped in a boy’s body" since the age of four - but when she came out to her mother at age fourteen, she was told that “God doesn’t make mistakes” and was sent to religious-based conversion therapy. This, as Leelah described in her suicide note, helped not at all and comprised of “more Christians telling me that I was selfish and wrong and that I should look to God for help.”
In order to better ease coming out as transgender, Leelah first came out at school as a gay male. According to a childhood friend, Alcorn received a positive reception from many at school, although her parents were appalled. Embarrassed, they removed her from school, and even social media, her phone and her friends until the end of the school year. Leelah felt very isolated, and following her parents’ refusal to allow her to transition, walked in front of a truck and was struck dead.
One of the sorriest things about the tragic affair was the reaction of her parents: though of course they mourned her loss, they continued to very publicly misgender her - even after her death, and in complete defiance of her passionate suicide note. In response this, the Alcorns noted that “We don't support that, religiously” but added that “We loved him unconditionally. We loved him no matter what. I loved my son. People need to know that I loved him. He was a good kid, a good boy.”
Yes, Leelah’s parents loved her. It is clear also, however, that they did not support her; it is tragically apparent in Carla Alcorn’s statement that Leelah’s parents fail to understand the true meaning of “unconditionally”.
However sad the situation, though, the actions of Alcorn’s parents must be seen in the wider context of the matter - they did not act appropriately, but for all that we can wish it not so, nor did
One of the most positive things in the wake of the tragedy is the huge media support shown both for Leelah and the trans community at large - mass vigils in Columbus and London, top-trending hashtags #LeelahAlcorn and #RealLiveTransAdult, widespread discussion in the media, and a 62,000 signature petition to the White House against conversion therapy. Alcorn was the recipient of dedications for both Ray Toro’s song “For the Lost and Brave” and Jill Soloway’s Golden Globe for television series “Transparent” - which deals with a father who comes out as transgender to his adult children.
That’s exactly the kind of awareness and change that Leelah pleaded for in her suicide note - but there’s still a long way to go. Over 50% of transgender youths attempt suicide before age 20. Over two thirds of transgender people experience homelessness. 72% of LGBT homicide victims in 2013 were transgender women.
"The only way I will rest in peace is if one day transgender people aren't treated the way I was, they're treated like humans, with valid feelings and human rights," Alcorn wrote. "Gender needs to be taught about in schools, the earlier the better. My death needs to mean something. My death needs to be counted in the number of transgender people who commit suicide this year. I want someone to look at that number and say 'that’s fucked up' and fix it. Fix society. Please.”
