Top 7 Christmas Films

1. Home Alone

The ultimate Christmas comedy

2. Elf

Feel good fun for the whole family

3. It's a Wonderful Life

The ultimate Christmas tearjerker

4. The Grinch

Jim Carey at his finest

5. Miracle on 34th Street

Richard Attenborough shines in his role as Saint Nick

6. The Polar Express

A deep and jolly Christmas film, a real rollercoaster ride

7. Jack Frost

Quirky but great fun

by Will Jennings

Spotlight: Essex band Never Means Maybe

Never Means Maybe are a pop-post-hardcore band from Chelmsford, Essex. Having been a part of at least 400 shows since forming in 2005 and gone through some line-up changes, this band proves that hard work really can get you places! Currently they are on tour with Fei Comodo and Exit Ten, all over the country, reaching out to the ever expanding fan-base they have created. They were a part of the Redbull Bedroom Jam competition last year, which gave them the opportunity to play at the major music festivals throughout the UK, including Download and Sonisphere festivals respectively. This year they released their latest EP, Strangers and two of their songs are regular players on ScuzzTv and Kerrang: Ziva Killed Houdini and Inhale The Chaos. Their sets are always full of energy and you can see, as part of the audience, that they just love to play music together regardless of who they’re playing in front of. The band always have time to talk to fans and network constantly and have become a staple part of the Essex music scene. They are a must see band, keep an ear out for them and try to see them play soon!
Happy Christmas from me to you, many musical returns, don’t forget to get in touch for me to review a band you want for next year’s magazine. :)
by Amy Fowler

Cheesy Christmas Cracker Jokes

Are Christmas adverts and the rush for late-night shopping taking away that all important festive fun? Nothing can get you in the Christmas mood better than some cheery cracker jokes. Here is a merry mixture of the top ten worst cracker jokes – just so you can have a double dose of delight before the big day!

1. Why would you invite a mushroom to a Christmas party?

He's a fun guy to be with.

2. How do snowmen get around?
They ride an icicle.

3. What's furry and minty?
A polo bear

4. Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy

5. What do you call a penguin in the Sahara desert?
Lost

6. Why was Santa’s little helper feeling depressed?
He had low elf-esteem

7. They say it wouldn’t be Christmas without M&S.

8. What's white and goes up?
A confused snowflake

9. What kind of paper likes music?
(W)rapping paper

And finally, the nation’s worst Christmas cracker joke –
10. What is Santa's favourite pizza?
One that's deep pan, crisp and even

Enjoy your festive season, wear those awkwardly placed gold hats and don’t forget to slip these into the family conversation at dinner on the 25th!

Scientists debate possibility of faster-than-light particle

Neutrinos, Oscillation Projects and bewildering theories. This may all seem overwhelming but it can be explained in an easily understandable format.

We all know of Einstein, but perhaps do not know of his work, fear not readers for I shall try to explain...

Amongst decades of investigations, number crunching and late nights on his lonesome Einstein produced many papers on different topics, most notably his theories of General and Special relativity (I would briefly explain them if I had any clue as to what they were, but unlike Einstein my brain is not the size of a goat.) Einstein stated that nothing, (except for Usain Bolt) can go faster than the speed of light, it is the universal speed limit. So when physicists from CERN, an organization for nuclear research, stated that they had propelled a Neutrino (picture an incredibly small ping pong ball) faster than the speed of light, the world stood in awe! Well perhaps not the whole world, but the science world sure did.

The large majority of our understanding of the universe is based on this vital law that nothing travels faster than light, the speed limit of light is also the basis of ‘cause and effect:’ effects always follow causes. If this statement did not stand, the basic laws of physics would have to be re-written! In a nut shell; several modules of what you future-physicists have learnt would have been somewhat wrong!

Many of you may or may not care about how the Neutrino managed to travel so fast, but I’m going to tell you anyway.
It didn’t.
Apparently.

“Right, if the CERN experiment proves to be correct, I will eat my boxer shorts on live TV.”
Jim Al-Khalili  (Theoretical Physicist) 

There is still much speculation over whether this actually happened or not, some say that the results were muddled, others just don’t believe them at all, Brian Cox blames extra dimensions! He says...

“...the universe might not have three dimensions, it might have other ones. If this is right then things can take short cuts through the extra dimensions. The neutrinos could be taking a shortcut through another dimension”

All very mind-boggling stuff.  Thankfully Brian Cox simplified this theory...

“Imagine there’s a speed limit that stops you going from London to Sydney; you fly around the circumference of the Earth. The other way to do it is to take a tunnel, straight through the earth with no speed limits; therefore this route is faster.”

That is what the theory proposes the Neutrino has done.

Believe what you choose to believe, as there is no correct answer just yet, so you can’t be wrong! I hope this has given you a small insight into the baffling work that is taking place as you read, or at least entertained you for a few minutes whilst you wait for tutorial to finish.

by Kerr McIlwraith

Christmas Planner

Saturday 17th December
First day of the holidays! Best spent chilling out after a LONG term working hard at college! Reward yourself, kick back with some Christmas movies (check our list on page **), hot chocolate, a tin of quality street and your best buddies!

Sunday 18th December
Sundays are the day for spending time with family, so why not spend the day visiting relatives you won’t see over the Christmas? Delivering cards and presents to friends and family you might not see, enough to give anyone that warm, fuzzy feeling one only gets from spreading Christmas cheer! (I know I sound corny but Christmas is catching!)

Monday 19th December
Monday, time to have a bit of fun, try a Christmas activity, tobogganing! Enjoy a few hours sliding down slopes with your friends, guaranteed to be a fun experience to get you set for the season to be jolly! Try Suffolk Leisure Park, £6.50 per person per hour! Happy sliding!

Tuesday 20th December
Today is time to make sure all your Christmas shopping is done! Head into town and stomp down the high street to get them deals! Fight the storm of shoppers and then head to Starbucks or Costa for a celebratory drink on beating them crowds!

Wednesday 21st December
Hmm, 21st December, close enough to Christmas that your decorations are up but far away enough that you aren’t in that mad dash to make sure everythings wrapped and ready! Take a chill pill, go to the cinema and check out ‘New Years Eve’ - latest rom com from the people that made ‘Valentines Day’. Whether you go with your lover or your friends its bound to be a good night! And afterwards a trip to Nandos is obviously
necessary and hey! You might see Olly Murs! ;)

Thursday 22nd December

Head up to Chelmsford and go ice skating! An experience guaranteed to get a few laughs out of, falling over being a main part of this dare devil activity! Riverside Ice Skating Rink costs £6.70 a session!

Friday 23rd December
The 23rd of December, the night most likely for parties and fun before the big day! Get all glammed up in your party gear (see our fashion faves page **) and your heels (boys too!;)) and head out to pull! Get under that mistletoe ladies and gents!

Saturday 24th December
Christmas Eve! The day for last minute prep! Baking, visiting relatives, eating too much, checking those lists to Santa to make sure you’ve written everything you want, wrapping presents, eating all the chocolates, dressing your pets up (is that just me?), stressing out your family.. Its all about tonight! Get an early night folks, Father Christmas is coming later and you’ll all have a busy day tomorrow!

Merry Christmas to you all!

By Paisley-Rose Tedder

Bringing it Back: Empire Records

Old School Films You Don't Want To Miss

Review of Empire Records

If you’re not feeling the cheer this year, or having started watching your favourite Christmas films in October, are sick of them then don’t despair because I am about to offer and alternative movie to fill your winter evenings.

This month’s old school movie is ‘Empire Records’ which was released smack bang in the middle of the nineties and contains some familiar faces. A young Liv Tyler, minus the horse and elf ears, and playing her best friend, Renee Zellweger feature in the film.
But besides a star studded cast ‘Empire Records’ has a lot to offer. The title of the film shares itself with the name of the record store where Tyler and Zellweger work alongside their colleagues and friends Lucas, A.J, Debra and Mark. Each of them has their own troubles which they in turn face and defeat with the help of their friends, their music and especially their boss Joe.

And when Joe has to front his own problems his staff are right their supporting him in the only way they know how: through music.

The soundtrack to this movie is quite simply awesome. As its set in a music store music features heavily throughout the film spotlighting artists like The Cranberries, the Dire Straits, Edwyn Collins and a final number performed and written by Coyote Shivers. Even if these names have flown straight over your head never fear, the songs are catchy, jumpy and for some may be love at first listen.
So if you’re looking for a film that isn’t coated with morals about family love and doesn’t feature scenes of excessive Christmas spirit, then why not broaden your horizons and dip into the 90’s with this gem of a film. I guarantee you’ll want a job at Empire Records when you’re done.

By Katherine Cudmore

No More Fashion Victims

If you’re stuck for ideas on what to buy your friends for Christmas, think the Environmental Justice Foundation, which have made the seemingly impossible possible, by blending fashion and the environment together.

EJF’s style is organic, bold and meaningful. The collection marks the charity’s tenth year, campaigning on issues of environmental justice, giving the millions of children forced to work in the cotton fields, a right to be heard and sending a message to the fashion industry to ‘Pick Your Cotton Carefully’.


Their biggest trademark piece is ‘The T-Shirt’. It is the most iconic and widespread piece of cotton clothing, used as a message board to positively promote fair-trade production. EJF’s aim is to prevent the use of forced child labour and to stop the use of deadly pesticides from cotton production. Their T-shirts are all ethically made with 100% organic cotton and Soil Association certified printing. Organic T-shirt designers include John Rocha, Betty Jackson, Ciel and John Patrick with most designs giving off that contemporary and casual look, guaranteed to suit everyone. EJF’s products are available from their website at an average price of £30, with all proceeds going towards the charity.

EJF also make organic cotton tote bags perfect for college or shopping. They come in two quirky designs and you can bag yourself one of these at http://www.ejfoundation.org.uk/ for only £15.

These are sure to make the perfect, thoughtful gift for Christmas, allowing you to buy with pride!

Merry Christmas! X

By Amelia Bolton

London Fashion Week 2011: The Great British Autumn

This year’s London Fashion Week went down like a treat for those who have a serious passion for fashion. London truly is one of the most iconic fashion cities and I couldn’t be more proud of us as a nation to be involved with such a great event such as Vodafone London Fashion Week. So what’s in store for this year’s Great British Autumn?

Let’s face it, winter time in Britain is at times rather chilly and damp. However this season, some of our top designers such as Jaeger have allowed us to embrace the wintry months. Jaeger is a global luxury fashion brand which is famous for designing stylish, innovative and contemporary pieces. The great winter coat plays a leading role in Jaeger’s AW11 collection. Exploring dramatic maxi-lengths as well as cropped proportions in rich and diverse textures, guarantees every one of us to find a coat we love! Blending jet blacks against a kaleidoscopic array of rich, jewel-colours such as burnt orange, emerald green and cobalt blue, seems to be a recurring mix within this season’s trend. This creates a minimal, modern yet quirky opulence for winter. We all want to keep warm when it’s blowing a breeze so it’s a good job knitwear is here to save us. It not only allows us to wrap up, but also shows off a diverse range of textures. Blends of brushed mohair, cashmere and sculptural wool jersey are iconic textiles of this Autumn/Winter collection.

Your hair is also a crucial element of your look, acting as your ultimate fashion accessory. TONI&GUY have been working backstage at London Fashion Week to create new and luxurious locks to meet the wardrobes of our designers. The new collection caters for many hair types and styles from casual to glamour, inspired by the world of fashion. My personal favourite is the Sea Salt Texturising Spray which masters the task of creating loose, suede tassels yet still maintaining that chic look.

Leave behind the lugging-your-coat-around-all-the-time feeling and say goodbye to those early morning dramas with your hair, by following this seasons’ trends. You’re guaranteed to feel uplifted this winter!

by Amelia Bolton

Building Yard (Poem)

My life is strange and foolish.
I can’t trust myself.
I’m doing mistakes, mistakes, mistakes.
But now, I start to ignore your help.

You think I have all problems?
With me, the world, and them?
You have all ideas, ideas, ideas.
But why don’t you look at you?

Don’t help me with my building yard!
Please, look first on your own.
I don’t need your help with my building yard,
when your own is a sea of shards.

The inside of you is broken.
You can’t repair yourself,
even if I rent you all the pieces,
and hear your need for help…

I always try to aid you,
but you are just re-recording it.
You always say you feel alone,
but you forget my being here.

Don’t help me with my building yard!
Look first on your own.
I don’t need your help with my building yard,
when your own is a sea of shards.

Stop judging my mistakes,
stop judging my charade -
or I’ll start believing
that your farce is the biggest of them all!

I’m more confident than you,
you just make an excuse.
Too lazy and too fragile,
to rebuild your world.

Don’t help me with my building yard!
Please, look first on your own.
I don’t need your help with my building yard,
when your own is a sea of shards.

by Xenia Stieger

Watch This Space! Rising Hollywood Stars

Lily Collins, the daughter of rock legend Phil Collins, is beginning to create a name in her own right.  She has previously had small roles in the hit US drama ‘90210’, and more recently has starred in the Oscar nominated film, ‘The Blind Side’ alongside Sandra Bullock. More recently, she has starred in ‘Priest’ and ‘Abduction’ alongside Taylor Lautner, a thriller about a teenager who finds out his parents are not really his parents after he sees himself as a baby on a missing persons website. Alongside her growing film career, Lily is also a keen follower of fashion. She was chosen in 2007 by Chanel to wear one of their gowns at the Bal des Débutantes (a charity ball), which was featured on ‘The Hills’ and was also chosen by Spain’s Glamour magazine in 2008 as their ‘International Model of the Year’.

Elle Fanning is following in the footsteps of her well established older sister, Dakota (of ‘Twilight’ fame). Elle started acting at the tender age of eighteen  months where she starred alongside Sean Penn in ‘I Am Sam’. More recently she has taken the lead in ‘Phoebe in Wonderland’, ‘Somewhere’ and ‘Super 8’. For her role in ‘Somewhere’, Elle won Film Actress of the Year in the Young Hollywood Award’s. Later this year, Elle will be starring in ‘We Bought A Zoo’ where she plays Scarlett Johansson’s thirteen year old daughter who is working illegally at a zoo. In July 2011, Elle controversially became the new face of Marc Jacobs’ Fall 2011 ad campaign.



Hailee Steinfeld began her acting career at the tender age of eight, initially starring in short films to gain experience. She played the lead role of Talia Alden in the semi-autobiographical short film ‘She’s A Fox’ which went on to win awards at several film festivals from 2009-2011. With this, and appearances in commercials and on television, Steinfeld was chosen out of 15,000 girls for the coveted role of Mattie Ross in the Oscar-nominated ‘True Grit’. For her role, she was announced as a nominee in the Best Supporting Actress category at the 83rd Academy Awards on January 25th 2011. Unfortunately, Steinfeld lost out to ‘The Fighter’ actress Melissa Leo, however, she went on to win the Breakthrough of the Year Award at the 2011 Young Hollywood Awards. Hailee has recently been cast as Juliet Capulet in an upcoming adaption of Shakespeare’s classic love story ‘Romeo & Juliet’, which is to be directed by Carlo Carlei. In May 2011, fashion label Miu Miu announced that it had chosen Steinfeld to be its new face. All of this, and she’s only fourteen years old.

Elizabeth Olsen is most recognisable as the younger sister of Mary Kate and Ashley, but is now beginning an acting career of her own. Elizabeth first appeared in the spotlight aged four, when she acted in her sisters’ first movie, ‘Our First Video’, and then later in ‘The Adventures of Mary-Kate and Ashley’. Elizabeth then stepped out of acting to concentrate on her education, which resulted in her graduating from the Tisch School of Arts and Atlantic Theatre Company. 2011 has been an important year for Elizabeth as she has fulfilled key roles in three movies; ‘Martha Marcy May Marlene’, ‘Silent House’ and most recently ‘Peace, Love & Misunderstanding’ (co-starring Chace Crawford and Jane Fonda).Following the positive reviews she gained from ‘Silent House’, Elizabeth landed a role alongside Hollywood legend Robert De Niro in the upcoming thriller movie ‘Red Lights’, and has several more roles lined up for her over the next year.

by Will Jennings and Elena Thompson

Bringing It Back: Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

Old School Films You Don't Want To Miss
Review Of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

In our world of glossy, high definition, 3D, digital films we can get swept up in the excitement of new Hollywood and as a result, become detached from the classic films that helped make the movie business what it is today. 

Now I am no movie connoisseur but I was subjected to many 80’s and old school pictures by my dad and consequently have become a bit of a fan of the lesser known but still timelessly brilliant titles. These films have stood the test of time but for some they remain unknown and I hope to change that by revealing a cinematic gem each edition.

To get the ball rolling I have decided to go against cliché by not raking out an ancient horror movie. In fact I have decided to cover the upbeat story of a teenage wise crack who is just trying to take a day off. Some people may already have an inkling of the film I’m referring to but for those who don’t October’s film is indeed ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off’ which was released in 1986 and definitely shows that eighties flare.

The eclectic soundtrack alone, which features epic names such as The Smiths, is enough to woo anyone to jump up and dance or at the very least rent out the movie. But besides the lyrical genius’ which sprinkle the soundtrack ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off has a lot more to offer. The plot to this film is a bit of a given considering the title; there is this kid Ferris Bueller and you guessed it, he wants to take a day off school. Of course however there is much more to it than that. Wonder at Ferris’ elaborate plots to kid his principal, sympathise with his weary sister, support him as he helps his best friend become the person he should be and root for him as he tries to get the girl, all while enjoying the various hijinks along the way.

And on top of this ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off’ contains some magnificent one liners which compliment the overall feel good vibe and comedy perfectly. So if you’re looking for laughs this Halloween rather than blood and gore look up ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off’ and settle yourself on the couch, cushions firmly left behind you rather than in front of your eyes.

by Katherine Cudmore

Film Review: Fright Night

Cert (UK):  15
Runtime: 106 minutes
Directors: Craig Gillespie

Following the sudden love for vampires over the past few years, Fright Night gives Twilight a run for its money. The remake of Tom Holland’s 1985 film stars Anton Yelchin as Charley Brewster, a teenager who suspects his new neighbour is a vampire. Marti Noxon, the writer of ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’, adds bite to the remake as he relocates the story to Las Vegas.

Charley is a high school kid who soon becomes convinced that his new neighbour Jerry (Colin Farrell) is a bloodsucking demon that has started to prey on the locals, including his ex-best friend Ed (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) and is determined to keep Jerry’s fangs away from his mother and girlfriend. Desperate, Charley turns to local celebrity magician and expert on demons, Peter Vincent, played by David Tennant. The two team up to save Charley’s girl and to vanquish the demons for good.

The film is clever and funny, and although it’s close to Halloween and the film involves vampires sucking out the neighbourhoods souls, it didn’t have me racing for the door in tears of fright. Although other audience members were jumping in their seats, the overall effect of the horror was only caused by the ashes and blood, popping out of the screen in all its 3D glory. The film was funny and a real change from the romance twist now attached to the vampire film industry. Fright Night is definitely one to wait for and watch on DVD.

By Megan North

Jukebox: What to listen to and why

New Releases

Ed Sheeran ‘+’ (Plus) It’s been out for a while now but ‘+’,  which fuses hip-hop and folk to create  a unique sound, is an album by and artist who you either love or loathe.  It has shot to the top of the album charts within the first week and already has 2 UK top ten singles under it’s belt. ‘+’ features comedic, intelligent lyrics that flow through the album. 
LISTEN TO:
The A Team
You Need Me, I Don’t Need You

Patrick Stump ‘Soul Punk’Patrick Stump is bouncing into a solo career with a foot tapping electro pop album. Soul Punk is released 18th October 2011 and includes the pre-release tracks Spotlight (New Regrets) and This City. Spotlight is an up beat track that all types of people would enjoy.
FOR PEOPLE WHO LIKE:
Fall Out Boy
Panic! At The Disco





Playlist

Hopefully something for everyone!

Sticks ‘n’ Stones - Jamie T       
This song has rough guitars and brilliant lyrics, guaranteed to put a smile on anyone's face.

‘Monster’-  Paramore               
The band is back with a single for The Transformers  Soundtrack. The song has the classic Paramore sound to it.

Smells Like Teen Spirit - Nirvana
With the 20th anniversary of Nevermind just passed, it seems only right to show a tribute to the album, probably the most famous Nirvana.

Nearly Witches (Ever since we met) - Panic! at the Disco
If you haven’t listened to Panic!’s new album yet, you really should! With some creepy child choir at the beginning and some hyped up violins, this song is a perfect mash up that you will love!

That Golden Rule - Biffy Clyro    
This song combines Simon Neil's street-gang vocals with bouncy guitars and a softer, catchier chorus. It’s a good song to tap your pen to why doing homework!

by Lucy Allen

Spotlight: An interview with Josh Leach from the band Adelaide

L-R Josh, Dave Fee, Dan, Lloyd, Dave Williams

Adelaide are a five-piece band from South-East London who have gone from strength to strength after first coming together in 2010. I managed to catch up with Josh, bassist and joint vocalist for Adelaide, earlier this month and this is what he had to say…

[Q] Where did the name Adelaide come from as a band name?

A: When we were searching for a name Lloyd saw Adelaide road near Charing Cross station. He texted us all and we all liked the name. In addition to liking the name Josh grew up in Adelaide Australia and Dan’s’ Granddad used to own a pub called The Adelaide. It just felt right.

[Q] What made you want to be in a band?

A: The joint passion to play music for all the right reasons.

[Q] What would you describe your sound as?

A: Crunching Guitars, Soaring Vocals, Energy. Like a T Rex tearing through a city.

[Q] What do you like most about being in Adelaide?

A: Touring, performing, writing music, sharing a common goal with your best friends.

[Q] Did you enjoy your recent tour with LYU and Jody Has A Hitlist?

A: We had the best time and had met some of our best friends in the world. That’s one of the best parts of being in a band, meeting amazing people and making genuine friends with people you wouldn’t normally meet.

[Q] Where was the gig you had the most fun playing?

A: For me I personally loved our London headline show at the Academy2 Islington. It was great to see so many people come and watch us and sing along.

[Q] Does anyone in the band have any weird things they have to do before each show?

A: Not really we all have a little chat and then chant Whitney Houston and Michael Bolton after three.

[Q] First show you ever went to?

A: My first concert was Westlife, haha but my first rock show was Korn and Puddle Of Mudd.

[Q] Best gig/festival you’ve been to and not played at?

A: I’m a Leeds Festival boy through and through I really want to try some others net year. Hevy festival is always pretty sweet too.

[Q] Funniest thing that’s ever happened to you or any other member of the band?

A: Whilst shooting our video our Guitarist Dave Williams tried to do a guitar swing on his close up. He failed it ended up hitting him in the back of the head and K.O.

[Q] Farthest you’ve ever played away from home?
A: We toured Sweden in 2010 that was pretty insane!

[Q] Was Journals fun to write/record? Where did you go to record it?

A: It was stressful in a good way. We all like different styles of music so that creates conflict when we come to write. I think it’s good to disagree when writing; it helps you force the best out of yourself.

[Q] If you could meet any musician in the world, dead or alive, who would it be?

A: I would love to meet so many people. Freddy Mercury, Jonny Cash, Elvis, Bob Marley, Kurt Cobain. Basically anyone who innovated and changed music in their time.

[Q] Dream gig line-up, either involving you or that you would go see?

A: For me (Josh)
The Cure, The Smiths, Johnny Cash, Buddy Holly, The Rat Pack , Led Zeppelin, ACDC, Aerosmith, Paramore, OLD Thrice, Adelaide, Framing Hanley, David Hasselhoff, Cliff Richard, Blink 182, Gary Numan .

[Q] What can we expect from Adelaide for the rest of this year and next year?

A: This year we are finishing up work on our new ep. We will also do a small run of shows around its release.
Next year we plan on being on the road as much as possible, so look out!

by Amy Fowler