Britain’s budding boozer– his plans to save the UK

In an interesting career turn, the comedian Al Murray is running for Parliament. Is it a comedic stunt or is there something more to Murray’s plight?- By James Sullivan

The small town of South Thanet in Kent has become the scene of a surprising protest vote in the run up to this year’s general election. 

It already faces the turmoil of the UKIP leader Nigel Farage attempting to overthrow conservative candidate Laura Sandys, however another candidate has entered the fray. Al Murray, the pub landlord. 

While at first glance it appears to be a comedic stunt, considering his exaggerative satirical policies. Yet Murray represents a far larger movement and it seems his potential rival is UKIP, whose leader was hoping to make an impact in the General Election.

Murray’s motivation is political, as he feels “the system is broken, we all know it is”. Murray is aiming at the people who don’t feel the need to vote, so voting for Murray is  to represent the unpopularity for the current political system.

It’s also why his newly formed Free United Kingdom Party can be so outlandish. It’s logo (an upside down Pound Sign), as well as some of the policies such as

immigration, are a clear mocking of UKIP and of the current desires British voters have. 

The Pub Landlord has policies on popular subjects such as immigration and Europe, yet they are so sarcastic it’s clear Murray is mocking the attitude of UK voters.

While his potential to be elected is as slim as the Pub Landlord joining Alcoholics Anonymous, it still proves to be an interesting contest. 

Murray’s target audience is arguably similar to UKIP’s– voters disillusioned with the current political system, so Murray could have potentially decent popularity in addition to the fact he is a popular comedian. 

What would be most intriguing to see is how close Murray can get to beating Nigel Farage. I mean if Nigel Farage can get beaten by a comedian, what hope does he have for being elected in Parliament?

Farage doesn’t seem phased by his latest competitor, even tweeting “The more, the merrier!” From retrospect it seems like a comical clash of two pint pinning politicians. Yet Al Murray’s character is just a façade for a intelligent man who is harnessing the audience politicians neglect– those who don’t vote.  

Could Murray begin a new political career? Who else could join FUKP? While Murray may not face success at this general election, his presence and popularity indicate public dissatisfaction. 

Why South Thanet?

• Murray competing with Nigel Farage is an attack at UKIP
• The Conservative MP for South Thanet (Laura Sandys) will stand down at the General Election
• Farage is local to South Thanet
• The seat is marginal–  the Conservatives didn’t win with a large majority

FUKP policies:

• UK to leave the EU by 2025 and the edge of the solar system by 2050
• Unemployment causes crime, so all the unemployed to be jailed
• Britain must become a worse country so it is less popular for immigration
• The cost of a pint is to be lowered to 1p (although crisps remain the same)
• South Thanet to be made into the Capital of the Uk
• Brick up the Channel Tunnel (using British bricks)
• Alex Salmond made First Minister of Norwich
• Greece to be bought and operated by Kent County Council
• The British Pound would be revalued to £1.10

“FIX SOCIETY. PLEASE.”

A report by Madeleine Bishop on the recent suicide of transgender teenager, Leelah Alcorn, and the media discussion  and public reaction that followed it. Should College teach more about gender?

February is LGBT History Month, a time to celebrate the lives and achievements of the gay community. In college, the LGBTQ society will be arranging a series of events to celebrate and raise awareness - from drag races to fake weddings. 

At this time, though, it also seems appropriate to consider the darker side of growing up gay, bi or trans - in late December the suicide of American transgender teenager, Leelah Alcorn, took the internet by storm. 

Alcon had felt “like a girl trapped in a boy’s body" since the age of four - but when she came out to her mother at age fourteen, she was told that “God doesn’t make mistakes” and was sent to religious-based conversion therapy. This, as Leelah described in her suicide note, helped not at all and comprised of “more Christians telling me that I was selfish and wrong and that I should look to God for help.”

In order to better ease coming out as transgender, Leelah first came out at school as a gay male. According to a childhood friend, Alcorn received a positive reception from many at school, although her parents were appalled. Embarrassed, they removed her from school, and even social media, her phone and her friends until the end of the school year. Leelah felt very isolated, and following her parents’ refusal to allow her to transition, walked in front of a truck and was struck dead. 

One of the sorriest things about the tragic affair was the reaction of her parents: though of course they mourned her loss, they continued to very publicly misgender her - even after her death, and in complete defiance of her passionate suicide note. In response this, the Alcorns noted that “We don't support that, religiously” but added that “We loved him unconditionally. We loved him no matter what. I loved my son. People need to know that I loved him. He was a good kid, a good boy.” 

Yes, Leelah’s parents loved her. It is clear also, however, that they did not support her; it is tragically apparent in Carla Alcorn’s statement that Leelah’s parents fail to understand the true meaning of “unconditionally”. 

However sad the situation, though, the actions of Alcorn’s parents must be seen in the wider context of the matter - they did not act appropriately, but for all that we can wish it not so, nor did 

One of the most positive things in the wake of the tragedy is the huge media support shown both for Leelah and the trans community at large - mass vigils in Columbus and London, top-trending hashtags #LeelahAlcorn and #RealLiveTransAdult, widespread discussion in the media, and a 62,000 signature petition to the White House against conversion therapy. Alcorn was the recipient of dedications for both Ray Toro’s song “For the Lost and Brave” and Jill Soloway’s Golden Globe for television series “Transparent” - which deals with a father who comes out as transgender to his adult children.

That’s exactly the kind of awareness and change that Leelah pleaded for in her suicide note - but there’s still a long way to go. Over 50% of transgender youths attempt suicide before age 20. Over two thirds of transgender people experience homelessness. 72% of LGBT homicide victims in 2013 were transgender women.

"The only way I will rest in peace is if one day transgender people aren't treated the way I was, they're treated like humans, with valid feelings and human rights," Alcorn wrote. "Gender needs to be taught about in schools, the earlier the better. My death needs to mean something. My death needs to be counted in the number of transgender people who commit suicide this year. I want someone to look at that number and say 'that’s fucked up' and fix it. Fix society. Please.”

Tuition Fees: What are we really paying for?

It’s old news now that the government decided to make our tuition fees rise to up to a whopping £9000 a year. But as a student who will be applying to university at the end of this year, I’m still wondering why I should have to pay such a hefty price tag.

When you look at the cost of living away from home while at University, it’s clear to see that it’s not cheap. According to NUS, the average cost of studying in London costs £23,521 a year, with over £13,000 being spent on living costs. With the average annual student income (loans and funding) being £17,450, you’ll need to find £6,071 to cover the shortfall. I’m already worried.

But my main concern is this: what will I actually be getting out of the £9,000 I’m paying each year? This is where the issue of “contact hours” comes into play. “Contact hours” are the number of hours spent (per year) in lectures and seminars, and are published by universities as part of their Key Information Set (KIS). To give an example, I looked on Unistats at the KIS for a BA (Hons) in English Language at the University of Sussex and found that only 16% of my time would be spent in lectures and seminars. But it’s the same across many other universities: for a similar course at the University of Chester, 17% of your time is spent in lectures and seminars; at the University of York, you’d only spend 13% of your time in lectures and seminars for a BA in Language and Linguistics. Of course, courses such as Biology, Drama and Art will have a higher number of contact hours. But even for Biology, you’re still looking at spending only 30% of your time at Uni. Is it really fair to make us students pay this much for so little? I don’t think so.

So, whilst I’m already concerned about how much of my own money I’ll have to find to live at university, I’m equally concerned about where this £9,000 a year is actually going. Personally, I don’t think it’s fair that we should have to pay so much for so few contact hours and to study something that we love. And that is why I think that it’s about time that tuition fees were reduced for good.

By Lauren Moon

The Changing World of YA Literature

A look at why the amount teenagers read has increased and why you should join them. By Chloe Dench

According to some media reports, the number of young adults reading has increased dramatically in the past few years. This is fairly shocking, as we teenagers these days have so many entertainment sources competing for our attention. But what exactly is causing us to turn off our screens (at least temporarily) to switch our attention to what could be considered old fashioned entertainment?

Maybe it’s the fact that reading really isn’t old fashioned anymore. E-readers and online fiction have brought the world of literature to the modern world. Like with films or music, e-readers mean you can now have books at your fingertips 24/7, making it not only easier to buy books, but also to carry them or to read more quickly. However, the figures for young adults reading have not shown such a clear increase since the creation of e-readers. Some studies show that our age group actually read less online than older age groups. For me, as much as I love the convenience of my kindle for instant downloads and reading on the go, nothing beats a real book. In terms of quality and ease of sharing, not to mention the significantly lower price, real books win every time.

So if it’s not the introduction of e-readers that has got more young adults reading, what is it? Maybe it is the power of social media and internet presences. Most of you will have at least heard of John Green’s The Fault In Our Stars, a book that undoubtedly would not have achieved the success it has done without his YouTube success or online fans sharing his work. Social media allows readers to connect with each other and with authors in a new way. An author releasing sneak previews can tempt readers to read on or buy the next book in the series. 

Social media has also changed who can become an author. Obviously, anybody could choose to write a novel, but the chances of getting it published in the traditional way are quite slim unless you are an established author. It’s hard to ignore the ‘online presences’ getting book deals these days; bloggers, vloggers etc. are all getting in on the action and causing a lot of controversy in the process. Zoe Sugg, aka Zoella, received huge backlash after rumours that her book was ghost-written. It’s clear that publishers only offer these online celebrities book deals to sell to a wider audience, but if this is part of the reason more of us are reading these days, it shouldn’t be seen as such a bad thing. 

As a Literature student, I am a bit biased towards the benefits of reading, but I’m not the only one who thinks reading more can only be a good thing. Mark Zuckerberg, has pledged to read at least 25 books this year. If even the creator of Facebook thinks it’s a good idea to spend more free time reading, what’s stopping you? 

Face Mask - Home Remedy

How to remove black heads, and troublesome skin. 

Are you having trouble with annoying black heads, and un wanted spots? Well, I've found the perfect, simple and easy home remedy make to help remove teenage skin problems. 

Step 1: 

Take 1/2 a lemon and squeeze  it into a small bowl.  The amount of lemon depends on how many people you are making it for. 

Step 2:

Now add 2 table spoons of baking soda, and mix into the lemon to create a thick paste. 

Once you have made your paste, apply to skin for 20minutes. Avoid getting it into your eyes or mouth, as I can imagine it stings, and I'm sure it doesn't taste like a 5* meal either! 

If you want to see more, check out;

                         Www.Allthingsplainandsimple.wordpress.com

Tonight Alive—London Koko 26th November 2014 review

Starting with the ‘The Edge’ a song featured in the new movie ‘The Amazing spider man 2’ the Australian band, Tonight Alive opened their  second London show on the 26th of November.

The band had chosen ‘Chunk, No! Captain Chunk!’ and ‘The Summer Set’  to open for them, a wise choice as most of the crowd had heard one or more of the songs.

Many of the crowd had seen the band since they had came on the music scene 7 years ago (2008) had said that it was one of the best gig’s they had been to. “Having first seen tonight alive a few years ago in a very small venue it is amazing to see the evolution of them. A really fun gig!”- Jenny Mercury (crowd member at the London Koko gig).

The band before their own gig’s had widened their fanbase by touring with bands such as ‘You Me At Six’ and ‘All Time Low’.

All together the band never missed a beat and even brought tears to some of the fans eyes during the song ‘Amelia’ which was written about a childhood friend of the vocalist Jenna McDougal On an interview Jenna revealed that Amelia died in a ski trip accident. She felt regretful that they had lost contact so she wrote the song but still felt like she "owed her so much more".

All together I would definitely go see the great band again and hope to see them playing bigger gigs in the future and maybe headline a festival one day.

ARE WE CHARLIE?

A dissection by Madeleine Bishop of some of the impact of the Charlie Hebdo shootings, not just on the French people or our freedom of speech, but on the Muslim community. 

The Charlie Hebdo shooting, on the 7th of January, was a violent and appalling act of terrorism that resulted in the death of twelve: ten employees, mostly cartoonists, and two police officers. In related acts over the following two days, five more people died at the hands of accomplices. 

The media uprising in the wake of the shooting was passionate and spectacular, culminating in unity marches across France, with over 1.6 million protestors just in Paris; 40 world leaders attended to show their support. 

All of the above is true, but it is not the whole story. It is easy to latch onto the media’s spin and accept it as ultimate truth - while intelligent, critical discussion can still reveal hidden depths to something that at first seems black and white. Let me make this clear: the “je suis kouachi” hashtag on twitter was appalling. I thoroughly condemn these acts of terrorism. I wholeheartedly agree that in democratic, secular society there is a necessity for constant, even offensive criticism of every institution, with satire, good satire, being the best vehicle for this - but there is something of a double standard in the French consciousness. 

When the French people marched to the Place de la Nation from the Place de la Republique, they marched not just for Charlie - they marched for a concept called Laïcité, the separation of religion from the public sphere to the point that crucifix necklaces and, rather more intrusively, the hijab are banned from schools. I am entirely for secularity - there is no place for the entwining of sin and crime in democracy - but there seems to me a contradiction in the French marching not just for freedom of speech, but essentially for the restriction of freedom of religious expression. 

Controversial comic Dieudonne M'bala M’bala was prosecuted for “inciting hatred” when producing very much the same content as Charlie Hebdo - but focused on mocking Jews. Where exactly lies the difference between the prosecuted and the revered? Charlie Hebdo is defended tirelessly - and while, yes, satire is meant to draw blood, and yes of course ideas and dogma should be challenged, satire is also supposed to “comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable” - and in the Muslim-wary Europe of today, who exactly is the comfortable? I’d be much more inclined to point towards those who sit in their thrones of xenophobia than a Muslim who happens to share the name of their god with a handful of horrible, violent extremists, as well as 1.8 billion other peaceful followers. Might I remind you that the KKK acts under the name of Christianity - as does the Westborough Baptist Church and as did the Nazis. And where do you see ordinary Christians being held accountable for the gassing and lynching and picketing by Christian extremists?

Yes, freedom of speech is incredibly important. But there is a point at which freedom of speech should not ethically justify horrible, pointed offence. Not that Charlie Hebdo is the Nazi Party: but take this extreme example - the hundreds of comics and children books and posters produced by Nazis mocking Jews (stereotypically large noses, huge black robes, stacks of money) and blaming them for problems far beyond any ordinary Jewish person’s control. Or perhaps the horrible grinning faces that make for the KKK’s interpretation of any Black person. Now put them in the context of Germany in 1936, or 1950’s America. Surely there is a point at which freedom of speech becomes unjustified, cruel and appallingly offensive? There is no need to fetishize it: just because we can say something, doesn’t mean we should. Of course anyone has the right to draw the Prophet Mohammed and associate it directly with the extremist actions of individuals who do not represent his peaceful teachings, and his billions of peaceful followers worldwide - many of whom happen to be ardently opposed to the depiction of their religious leader full stop - but is that really satire? Is it comforting the afflicted? Or is it just feeding into a larger mainstream of prejudice - prejudice itself the institution really worthy of being criticised and mocked. 

As Europe steadily swings to the right, we can only fear that there will be further gains on the part of the Islamophobic, searching desperately for a nice, general and easily accessible group of people to neatly blame for both terrorism and the perceived problems of immigration. Does it matter if they’ve been living in Britain or France for generations, and are absolutely contributors to their society? To some people, not a jot. 

The protests of the 12th of January were an incredible show of support, and commendable - but where are the 40 world leaders publicly protesting the thousands of deaths in Syria and Gaza? Many of them directly or indirectly at the hands of the West, who drew the Sykes-Picot line, trained Al-Qaeda and even now stand back as Israeli drone-warfare continues. The Paris march was a beautiful thing, but that beautiful thing should be happening in the name of many, many other causes besides.

Following the Sydney hostage crisis back in early December, #illridewithyou went viral: a preventative measure by conscientious members of the community who feared a backlash of anti-Muslim sentiment, offering support to Muslims travelling alone who might be threatened. The hashtag was inspired by a Facebook post about someone offering to walk with a woman who had felt threatened enough to remove her headscarf. This kind of drawing together of the community is exactly the sentiment required to face off hashtags like #jesuiskouachi and pave a way to a better, freer, more tolerant future.